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who stood by me； but this soon abated； and by degrees； as my
blood grew warm； I thought no more of my own safety； but fell on
the enemy with great fury； and did a good deal of execution；
till； unhappily； I received a wound in my thigh； which rendered
me unable to stand any longer； so that I now lay among the dead；
and was constantly exposed to the danger of being trampled to
death； as well by my fellow…soldiers as by the enemy。 However； I
had the fortune to escape it； and continued the remaining part of
the day and the night following on the ground。
〃The next morning； the duke sending out parties to bring off the
wounded； I was found almost expiring with loss of blood；
notwithstanding which； as immediate care was taken to dress my
wounds； youth and a robust constitution stood my friends； and I
recovered after a long and tedious indisposition； and was again
able to use my limbs and do my duty。
〃As soon as Dover was taken I was conveyed thither with all the
rest of the sick and wounded。 Here I recovered of my wound； but
fell afterwards into a violent flux； which； when it departed；
left me so weak that it was long before I could regain my
strength。 And what most afflicted me was； that during my whole
illness； when I languished under want as well as sickness； I had
daily the mortification to see and hear the riots and excess of
my fellow…soldiers； who had happily escaped safe from the battle。
〃I was no sooner well than I was ordered into garrison at Dover
Castle。 The officers here fared very indifferently； but the
private men much worse。 We had great scarcity of provisions；
and； what was yet more intolerable； were so closely confined for
want of room （four of us being obliged to lie on the same bundle
of straw）； that many died； and most sickened。
〃Here I had remained about four months； when one night we were
alarmed with the arrival of the earl of Boulogne； who had come
over privily from France； and endeavored to surprise the castle。
The design proved ineffectual； for the garrison making a brisk
sally； most of his men were tum… bled down the precipice； and he
returned with a very few back to France。 In this action；
however； I had the misfortune to come off with a broken arm； it
was so shattered； that； besides a great deal of pain and misery
which I endured in my cure； I was disabled for upwards of three
months。
〃Soon after my recovery I had contracted an amour with a young
woman whose parents lived near the garrison； and were in much
better circumstances than I had reason to expect should give
their consent to the match。 However； as she was extremely fond
of me （as I was indeed distractedly enamored of her）； they were
prevailed on to comply with her desires； and the day was fixed
for our marriage。
〃On the evening preceding； while I was exulting with the eager
expectation of the happiness I was the next day to enjoy； I
received orders to march early in the morning towards Windsor；
where a large army was to be formed； at the head of which the
king intended to march into the west。 Any person who hath ever
been in love may easily imagine what I felt in my mind on
receiving those orders； and what still heightened my torments
was； that the commanding officer would not permit any one to go
out of the garrison that evening； so that I had not even an
opportunity of taking leave of my beloved。
〃The morning came which was to have put me in the possession of
my wishes； but； alas！ the scene was now changed； and all the
hopes which I had raised were now so many ghosts to haunt； and
furies to torment me。
〃It was now the midst of winter； and very severe weather for the
season； when we were obliged to make very long and fatiguing
marches； in which we suffered all the inconveniences of cold and
hunger。 The night in which I expected to riot in the arms of my
beloved mistress I was obliged to take up with a lodging on the
ground； exposed to the inclemencies of a rigid frost； nor could I
obtain the least comfort of sleep； which shunned me as its enemy。
In short； the horrors of that night are not to be described； or
perhaps imagined。 They made such an impression on my soul； that
I was forced to be dipped three times in the river Lethe to
prevent my remembering it in the characters which I afterwards
performed in the flesh。〃
Here I interrupted Julian for the first time； and told him no
such dipping had happened to me in my voyage from one world to
the other： but he satisfied me by saying 〃that this only
happened to those spirits which returned into the flesh； in order
to prevent that reminiscence which Plato mentions； and which
would otherwise cause great confusion in the other world。〃
He then proceeded as follows： 〃We continued a very laborious
march to Exeter； which we were ordered to besiege。 The town soon
surrendered； and his majesty built a castle there； which he
garrisoned with his Normans； and unhappily I had the misfortune
to be one of the number。
〃Here we were confined closer than I had been at Dover； for； as
the citizens were extremely disaffected； we were never suffered
to go without the walls of the castle； nor indeed could we；
unless in large bodies； without the utmost danger。 We were
likewise kept to continual duty； nor could any solicitations
prevail with the commanding officer to give me a month's absence
to visit my love； from whom I had no opportunity of hearing in
all my long absence。
〃However； in the spring； the people being more quiet； and another
officer of a gentler temper succeeding to the principal command；
I obtained leave to go to Dover； but alas！ what comfort did my
long journey bring me？ I found the parents of my darling in the
utmost misery at her loss； for she had died； about a week before
my arrival； of a consumption； which they imputed to her pining at
my sudden departure。
〃I now fell into the most violent and almost raving fit of
despair。 I cursed myself； the king； and the whole world； which
no longer seemed to have any delight for me。 I threw myself on
the grave of my deceased love； and lay there without any kind of
sustenance for two whole days。 At last hunger； together with the
persuasions of some people who took pity on me； prevailed with me
to quit that situation； and refresh myself with food。 They then
persuaded me to return to my post； and abandon a place where
almost every object I saw recalled ideas to my mind which； as
they said； I should endeavor with my utmost force to expel from
it。 This advice at length succeeded； the rather； as the father
and mother of my beloved refused to see me； looking on me as the
innocent but certain cause of the death of their only child。
〃The loss of one we tenderly love； as it is one of the most
bitter and biting evils which attend human life； so it wants the
lenitive which palliates and softens every other calamity； I mean
that great reliever； hope。 No man can be so totally undone； but
that he may still cherish expectation： but this deprives us of
all such comfort； nor can anything but time alone lessen it。
This； however； in most minds； is sure to work a slow but
effectual remedy； so did it in mine： for within a twelve…month I
was entirely reconciled to my fortune； and soon after absolutely
forgot the object of a passion from which I had promised myself
such extreme happiness； and in the disappointment of which I had
experienced such inconceivable misery。
〃At the expiration of the month I returned to my garrison at
Exeter； where I was no sooner arrived than I was ordered to march
into the north； to oppose a force there levied by the earls of
Chester and Northumberland。 We came to York； where his majesty
pardoned the heads of the rebels； and very severely punished some
who were less guilty。 It was particularly my lot to be ordered
to seize a poor man who had never been out of his house； and
convey him to priso